rapin Times is a newspaper recently founded by campus conservatives with funding from the Republican Party-affiliated 
Leadership Institute.
The Mission Statement of The Terrapin Times is as follows:
The expressed purpose of the The Terrapin Times shall be to inform the student body of the University of Maryland, College Park on relative issues concerning them. The day-to-day operations are run by UMCP students and are concerned with issues relating to the daily lives of the campus community. The periodical will also serve as an educational tool for the student body in terms of explaining conservative principles. The "The Terrapin Times will print news items only with thoroughly documented research and we will not tolerate social, political, or economic injustices upon our campus.
The Terrapin Times hopes to one day be self-supported financially and does sell ads, but it currently runs off of free money provided by the conservative Leadership Institute. The funding institution is designed to promote the conservative agenda and prepare little conservatives for life in the machine. Their founder Morton C. Blackwell is a little-known Supporter Of Political Genocide.
Conservative individuals in general and those involved with the Terrapin Times in particular like to make fun of activists as dirty, ignorant hippies. However, we are really good intentioned, intelligent and friendly. For this reason, despite the hostility coming from those within The Times, we would like to offer our assistance with their Mission Statement. They are apologists for the oppressors, may have studied less in English class, are less gifted with the English language, or just pay little attention to their work. Nevertheless, we are all brothers and sisters in the struggle for good grammar, and we need to learn to work together.
Analysis of Mission Statement, suspicicious passages in caps, commentary in bold
The expressed purpose of the The Terrapin Times shall be to inform the student body of the University of Maryland, College Park on RELATIVE ISSUES CONCERNING THEM
There are two main things wrong with this passage 1) it is redundant to say relative issues concerning them (perhaps the author meant relevant not relative) 2) since the "relative issues" concern the "student body," a singular pronoun should be used instead of the plural "them".
An overall problem with the mission statement is that the verb tense is not consistent: In the first sentence, the verb tense is passive future. It is a bad idea to use a verb tense that requires a modifier (such as will, am, are, shall, etc) when writing for a news publication. You want to have the most impact with the least amount of words. And you do not want to use a passive tense in a news publication if you can avoid it. Active, active, active.
The day-to-day operations ARE RUN by UMCP students and ARE CONCERNED WITH ISSUES RELATING TO THE DAILY LIVES OF THE CAMPUS COMMUNITY.
Again, this is redundant, simply repeating the previous sentence. Also the sentence is unclear as it suggests that the day-to-day operations are concerned with the campus community. The message here is unclear.
And again about verb tenses! In the second sentence the verb tense is passive present. The aforemented issues of inconsistent verb tense, passive tenses, and modifiers are all problems here.
The periodical WILL ALSO SERVE AS AN EDUCATIONAL TOOL FOR THE STUDENT BODY IN TERMS OF EXPLAINING CONSERVATIVE PRINCIPLES
This sentence is understandable but sounds awkward. In particular, "in terms of" is too wordy. Concise is always best! And again, there are verb tense issues. This third sentence uses active future tense. Props to the Terp Times staff for choosing an active tense in this sentence, but shame on you for your consistently inconsistent verb tenses and your use of modifiers. Your mission statement is 4 sentences long and uses 3 different verb tenses. Congratulations, that takes some real effort
THE THE TERRAPIN TIMES only one "The" is needed will print news items only with thoroughly documented research a comma should be used here and we will not tolerate social, political, or economic injustices upon our campus. Wow, thats almost an anti-oppression statement; let's hold them to that.
This last sentence is also a little bit of a run-on sentence. While not grammatically incorrect, you've got two completely different complex sentences and ideas going on there.
WE would also like to offer an alternative Mission Statement that makes sense while still preserving the same basic message as the original Mission Statement. The original Mission Statement was so fucked that it was difficult to salvage it at all, but we tried.
The Terrapin Times shall inform the student body of the University of Maryland, College Park on issues concerning the campus community. The day-to-day operations are to be run by UMCP students concerned with issues that affect the daily lives of those on campus. The periodical will also serve as an educational tool for the student body by explaining conservative principles. For the purpose of journalistic integrity, The Terrapin Times will only print news items with thoroughly documented research, and we will not tolerate social, political, or economic injustices on our campus.
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